New Beginnings Family and Children's Services

Our family was one of three that traveled to Yangchun in early May 1997, with one of the social workers from our agency, Barbara Graffeo, and our Chinese guide, David. LiAnn was brought to us at the Golden Roc Hotel at ten o'clock at night, after a harrowing 5 1/2 hour van ride from Guangzhou to Yangchun (a too-small van, a truly maniacal driver, plus a main road into Yangchun that looked and felt more like a motocross racecourse than anything else, did not make for a restful trip). The three sets of anxious/nervous new parents were brought to David's room to meet their daughters -- all of whom were eleven months old and quite healthy, except that each had a slight cold. Obviously, all of the parents were thrilled, and the caregivers from the orphanage and local Civil Affairs officials were almost equally excited for the babies: here were their families, at last. It was a very party-like atmosphere. Our daughter was even more beautiful than her referral picture.

LiAnn was not one of those babies who automatically accepted her new parents. When she's very upset, LiAnn makes a high-pitched wail, which she demonstrated for us almost as soon as we took her back to our room to spend some time alone, getting acquainted. Next thing we knew, there was the orphanage director at our door, helping us to calm her down. Our daughter was, in fact, perfectly miserable for the first two days of our life together, and there were only three things that would sooth her: being wheeled about in her stroller (we spent plenty of time strolling up and down the hotel corridors) a rattle that lit up (with a picture of a baby on the outside of the package that she loved; the rattle didn't make it out of its wrapping until about Day 7), and singing. And not only had she been left in this strange place with weird-looking people who made nonsensical noises, at first they were trying to feed her this NASTY soy-based formula!

LiAnn had not been in foster care, so it was unlikely that she had bonded with any particular individual, but she was clearly sensitive to the change in her circumstances. As one of the people in our group put it, if we thought of it from the babies' point of view, being left in a hotel with a pair of Americans was probably something like being kidnapped by aliens. It definitely wasn't just us, though. The waitresses in the hotel restaurant loved the babies, and they could be counted on to "kidnap" all three at each meal, picking them up and making a fuss over them, carrying them around the dining room. They soon learned, however, that "kidnapping" LiAnn wasn't so much fun. One by one they tried to charm her, but each got the same wail in response.

We were in Yangchun from Monday night until Saturday morning, and spent most of the time in the hotel, waiting for some adoption official or another and playing with the baby on the bed. We had brought several small toys and books with us, and LiAnn was fascinated by everything. At first she played VERY seriously, and warmed up to us slowly. We knew we had a breakthrough on day three, when she got upset at a sudden noise and crawled toward her new mommy for reassurance.

We would occasionally take her for strolls around Yangchun, which is a small and very walkable city. It was hot and humid and the air was acrid - there's a lot of small industry in Yangchun, including light welding, and it leaves the air very smoky so we actually preferred staying in the hotel much of the time -- even though the smell of the hotel wasn't any great shakes, either. The people were fascinated by us (they definitely don't see a lot of westerners in this part of China), and delighted by the baby. We quickly got used to being the center of attention whenever we set foot outside. As in the rest of China, the people were extremely friendly and we were often greeted with a chorus of "hallo, hallo!" when we went out; a return hello from us would usually cause fits of giggles. The outdoor markets were always interesting to visit and there are a couple of nice parks in town. Unfortunately, we never made it into the countryside, which looks beautiful.

The notary told us that LiAnn had been found on June 12, 1996 on Red Flag Road, in the center of Yangchun. We set out with her in the stroller the next day, and found that Red Flag Road was the equivalent of Fifth Avenue - if you wanted your baby to be found ASAP, Red Flag Road was the place. We took lots of pictures. And still wonder if her bio mother watched over her until someone came and picked up her week-old baby.

On Day Four we were invited to visit the orphanage. As LiAnn had only just begun to accept us, we were concerned that a visit to the orphanage might upset her. On the other hand, there was no way to decline gracefully, and years down the road, how could we tell LiAnn that we didn't take the opportunity to see the place where she'd spent the first eleven months of her life?

We all rode in pedicabs to the orphanage, about a ten minute trip from the hotel. As we entered the inner courtyard, all of the caregivers were standing on the second floor balcony, waving and calling to our returning babies. We saw two buildings, which housed 123 babies, all but the very youngest in her own crib. Each crib had a tatami mat-type flooring and comforter; we saw no toys, but there were a couple of walkers that were apparently used by the older babies in turn. We were also shown an area out back where a new facility was being built, paid for with the adoptive families' donations to the orphanage. It was obviously a no-frills place, but the orphanage workers clearly try to do their best for the babies.

LiAnn was surprisingly calm throughout the visit. She scratched the back of her head frequently, which she does when she's feeling a little anxious, but other than that showed no sign of distress. She didn't seem to react particularly to any of the caregivers or the other babies, although one was pointed out to us as her crib neighbor and a special friend. After that, her attachment to us grew steadily. Of course, having finally switched to milk-based formula and offering her fruit flavored baby food didn't hurt.

Each of the three babies in our group had a very different personality. From the beginning, LiAnn was Miss Serious, while Jacqueline was Miss Happy and Grace was Miss Serene. LiAnn was the smallest of the three, weighing 14 1/2 pounds at her medical checkup in Guangzhou. When we first met her, she could pull herself up in her crib, but she couldn't sit up by herself and couldn't crawl. Having the opportunity and a reason to do so, though, she was able to do both within a matter of days. From the beginning, she was extremely alert and she really checked things out - people included.

We finally received the babies' passports on Friday and on Saturday morning headed back to Guangzhou. The motocross racecourse lay ahead, but at least we had a new driver.